Spiritual Parenting

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A few decades ago when I got a masters degree in psychology, I particularly loved a relatively new branch of research: pre- and peri-natal psychology. The studies showed amazing evidence that children in utero had pre-established psychological tendencies, and that during extro-gestation (roughly, the first nine months after birth) those tendencies established themselves as anchor points in the child’s egoic system.

Because of the size of a baby’s head in comparison to the size of the birth canal, human babies are born quite early in their gestational process. That’s why we have that extro-gestational period. Unlike other mammal babies that can get up and walk around and find food and begin their playful phase immediately, human babies have to be nurtured for a long time before they reach those levels of maturity. I found this area of study to be so fascinating that I joined the organization called Pre- and Peri-Natal Psychological Association and traveled all over the country to conferences and lectures.

My formal studies in psychology ended 10 years before the invisible garment material came into my consciousness. When I began my exploration into the 30 spiritual principles, it occurred to me that the in-utero tendencies weren’t psychological, but rather they were the baby’s invisible garment starting to form before birth. As soon as I examined my own children’s garment patterns, I realized that their spiritual principles were at work even as they were in utero. If you are a mother who has given birth to more than one child, you KNOW WHAT I MEAN. Different babies behave differently in your very belly.

I then began to work with parents, using their children’s invisible garment patterns to help them understand the best way to guide their young children. The best way, of course, is to know Who Your Child Is. The very earliest years of life (maybe the first 18 years) are all about developing a robust egoic system. This development must be healthy and stable. If the parent knows the spiritual egoic influences of a child, he or she can assist them in that development in a healthy, supportive, disciplined manner.

The invisible garment postulates that each of us takes an incarnation in order to deliver a specific gift to humanity. The sun principle in our natal chart designates the primary aspect of the gift. But the four personal pillars (Ascendant, Mercury, Venus and Mars) represent the four bodies (ethical, mental, emotional and physical respectively) that make up our egoic system.

The bottom line is this: if you know your child’s egoic blueprint – if you know how his mental body tends to integrate data – if you know he processes emotions – if you know what his physical body needs in order to be embodied – if you understand his ethical tendences – then you know how to create a healthy, bonded, supportive, creative environment for him. That’s the work of early childhood parenting. The sun principle – his primary gift – shows up later in life through the framework of his egoic system. If the ego is healthy, the gift will be delivered gracefully and beautifully.

Of course, because each child is different, each child experiences his or her parents differently, and in fact each child deserves to be parented differently! The concept that different children deserve a personalized parenting plan goes counter to our “life should be fair and all kids in a family should be treated equally” cultural consensus. But, if you really look at your children’s garment patterns, you’ll see . . .

Too many parents are afraid of their children! They’re afraid the kids won’t like them. They’re afraid that the children will be hurt by not always “winning.” They’re afraid of what the culture will do to their children. This invisible garment system takes the fear away. It doesn’t take all the heartache and suffering of watching them make mistakes, but it takes the fear of failure (yours and theirs) out of the equation.

This blog will be a series of articles where I can share some of the insights I’ve had about parenting using the invisible garment pattern of your child. Each article will highlight one specific child, but you’ll be able to extrapolate from that example what you need to now. Some of the children I’ll write about are high functioning, some “problem” children, some who live in the autism spectrum, some who have presented specific challenges for the parent. All names are changed, sometimes genders are changed, always locations and any other “identifying” markers are changed. However the principles in the child’s garment pattern (and the parent’s garment pattern) are not changed. The operation of the spiritual principles within the child’s ego is the crux of this information.

Please feel free to comment and ask questions and add insights!

Resistance and Patience

By |2017-03-30T09:23:55+00:00February 6th, 2017|Categories: Spiritual Parenting|

Spiritual Parenting - even when it's tough! A few weeks ago my all-grown-up daughter came over for a visit. She expressed interest in finding some pictures of herself in middle school – during her “goth” phase - so we began rifling through the picture boxes. In the course of it all, she opened a door to a cabinet and discovered many many little books. “ Those are my journals,” I explained. After a few quiet and thoughtful moments she said, “Mom, my brother and I don’t need to read your journals. So at some point before you die, will you please get rid of them?” We laughed heartily, as I have [...]


By |2017-03-30T09:23:56+00:00July 20th, 2016|Categories: Spiritual Parenting|

I’ll start with Steve, a child who falls within the autism spectrum.  I’m starting with him because there are so many “Steves” right now that the conversation about the special needs of autistic children seems to dominate parenting conversations. Steve’s parents divorced when he was seven.   Prior to the divorce, they didn’t notice anything particularly unusual about Steve, other than he was a loner in the family.  But almost immediately when the parents separated he began dissociating at home and his teachers noticed that he was disorganized and unable to attend to the details of his schoolwork.  However, his story-telling abilities and his creative use of language flourished.  He began demonstrating [...]